FAQs on Mothers of Influence
In association with The Well-Educated Heart & Libraries of Hope
Two years ago I opened my doors to a bunch of strangers I met on Instagram and now they are some of my best friends. Recently one of the women in our group gave me this piece of art showing a stranded pioneer. She said, “When I saw this painting, it reminded me of you. This was me a few years ago…but you’ve come and rescued us.” She has thanked me multiple times for “gathering” our group. To be honest, I never realized that’s what I was doing until she said it like that. I was just looking for some friends who would uplift me in motherhood. But, when she said that it made me realize how much gathering like this is in our blood and now I notice it everywhere. Women helping other women. Shepherding and ministering to one another. It is so clear to me now - it isn’t me that is gathering these women - it is the Lord. He is giving us the support structures we need to survive these last days and prepare us for His second coming. Not everyone will find this within a MOI group - the Lord is working in so many different places - but some will and if that’s you - then maybe this post is for you.
Over the years I’ll get a handful of questions on what is my Mothers of Influence group or how to start or structure one so today I am answering some of those FAQs.
What are “Mothers of Influence?”
Mothers of Influence (MOI) are women who come together to “be centered in God and recognize that He’s the source of influence as we refine the art of mothering, the art of relationships, the art of “home”-making, the art of gentleness, the art of unity, the art of civility, the art of kindness, and the art of love. Each of these is a creative expression of heaven’s light flowing through us.” (Mothers of Influence Guidebook, p. 1)
These groups were first organized by Marlene Peterson, the founder of The Well-Educated Heart and Libraries of Hope (WEH & LOH) and now they are found all over the world. Typically, MOI groups meet once a month for a group discussion and the primary focus of these discussions are meant to uplift and support our growth in motherhood. Further, Marlene explained a goal of educating our motherly hearts is to preserve a culture of faith, freedom, and family and the love of the good, the true, and the beautiful. The group’s discussion usually center around the free material in the Catch Your Vision Course or the Mother’s University which I’ll share more about below.
Do you have to homeschool to be apart of MOI?
No. I would say mothers who already homeschool are drawn to WEH because of the high emphasis and recognition that our divine motherly natures call us to take charge of our children’s upbringing and more specifically, their education. As a result, many mothers are recognizing the warning signs of the educational institutions around us and are seeking change and new opportunities.
From what I have observed in the majority of groups - the group leader is usually a homeschooler or has homeschooled at some point in their life. I would assume this is probably because they’ve already been drawn to WEH seeking direction and community which then naturally causes them to create a group. However, many groups form with the majority of women who don’t homeschool yet are still seeking to grow and enrich in their motherly natures.
Currently, my group has a mix of full-time homeschoolers and families where some children are homeschooled and some attend public school. Personally, I prefer a mix so if you’re interested in starting a group - I would encourage you to seek all kinds of educational diversity.
Is there a specific religious affiliation with the Well-Educated Heart?
No. Marlene has sought to make the group non-denominational with a Christian world-view perspective. Marlene is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (as am I) and every once in a while she does quote church leadership or The Book of Mormon, but it is very general and not preachy. Our faith culture is one that often tries to be very respectful of other’s belief systems, but also seeks companionship in a central belief of Christ - as we believe He wants us to.
One of our faith statements say, “We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul—We believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.” To this end, I think Marlene has followed this well and sought to be honest and upfront and stand for Christ as she strives to unite mothers of all faiths under Him. I know many MOI groups that are in my church because I live in this faith culture, but observing in the Facebook and Mighty Networks groups (see below) it is also clear to me that there are many other groups of women who are of other denominations.
Is it a co-op? Are children involved?
These groups are just for mothers. However, our group has had multiple break off groups where our children are more involved (see more about this below).
Do you or do you have to follow “the rotation” to be apart of MOI?
You don’t need to follow the rotation to be apart of MOI. I don’t follow the rotation. I think it is great and dabbled in it a few years ago, but it isn’t something I’ve felt impressed to use anytime soon. When I ask myself - could I ever see myself use this? The inspiration that comes to my mind is “maybe when your kids are older.”
In my group of 30+ women I think about 1/3 of the women are currently using the rotation.
MOI and WEH are more of a lifestyle and there is certainly a wide range of what that means to people. As I mentioned these groups were ultimately organized to find support with like-minded mothers who are striving to grow and continually nurture their motherly natures.
How can I start my own group or join an existing MOI group?
The first step in beginning your own group or finding a group is to complete the free Catch Your Vision (CYV) course found here. Once you’ve done that you’ll understand more about the vision behind The Well-Educated Heart and Mothers of Influence.
If you are just starting out with CYV, I would recommend joining the Well-Educated Heart Facebook group so that as you have questions (and you will) you’ll have a good community to plug into.
After you’ve listened to CYV and if you are ready to start your own group, you’ll want to join the Mighty Networks MOI community. It is a one time fee of $25. This will plug you into the MOI community and from there you will be able to find and connect with other like-minded mothers in your area. This is the first place I would look to gather for your own group. If you are looking to join a group - this is also where you can ask and see what options are available near you. You could also ask in the Facebook group.
If you are unable to find anyone in the Mighty Network group or looking to gather more people then I would recommend inviting others from your local church and community. Be prayerful about this process and follow the impressions you receive to invite others even if its out of your comfort zone. As I mentioned before, many mothers are seeking this even if they don’t realize it.
Personally, my group was started and has been fed by gathering through my Instagram community. When I started my group, my social media network was much smaller - so don’t be afraid to tap into the social resources around you to connect with like-minded people. I will note that I went through a screening process to make sure everyone was who they said they were. In another example, I have a good friend who homeschools - she organized one of her groups all with people from her church even though none of them homeschooled.
Can I join your MOI group?
I would LOVE to invite everyone into my home. I know there is such a need for community and it’s my dream to gather more women together one day. At this time my group is currently closed to new members. We have 30+ families in our group and it was getting too large to accommodate more people and build closer relationships amongst one another.
How many people should I invite to a group?
You can invite as many as you’d like. When I started my group - there was about 50 people who were interested. Remember I posted on my active IG account in a community of already like-minded mothers so this is probably not the norm. About 25 of those original 50 actually came to our first meetings and today maybe 20 of those original 25 are still apart of the group. Currently, I’ve found with 30-40 people we usually have about half or so attend our monthly gatherings. 10-15 people are great for a good discussion, but there are times we’ve had more than that and times we’ve had fewer than that. The smaller the group, typically, the closer our relationships are which is another reason we decided to close the group - to work on nourishing the relationships we have started. Even if you find just one other friend to share in a passion for MOI and motherhood - then start there. As a general gathering rule of thumb, you can usually expect half of who you invite to attend.
What do your meetings look like?
Every MOI group will be unique and look different. A good friend I met on IG mentored me in the creation of my group. She has hosted several MOI groups - both in person and on-line with homeschoolers and non-homeschoolers, with others who share her same religion and others that don’t. There is no one right way to do this.
Personally, for my group we gather on a set day each month and we’ve been very consistent. In two years, we’ve never missed a meeting. It’s hosted at my house every time, but I’ve seen other groups have rotating hosts. I prefer to host rather than coordinate rotating hostesses, but you could set it up however you’d like. We meet from 7:00-8:30 PM and stay on our topic of discussion. After, we often will talk about life, education, and motherhood and build relationships late into the evening hours. We meet near the start of the month so we study the month prior to our meeting. For example, in the Mother’s University October’s topic is “Nature Study” so we’ll be listening and reading content from Nature Study in September to come prepared to discuss for October’s meeting. If you schedule your meetings for, say, the last Monday evening of each month, then it would make sense to just study the content for October through out the month.
When we first started the group (it was September) only about half of the attendees had gone through the Catch Your Vision course so we started there. The CYV course is 6 sections. Since many of us had just gone through it, but some still needed to, we decided to study the course 2 sections at a time for 3 months. So, when we met for our first meeting in September we discussed the content in “The Mother’s Heart” and “A Change of Heart.” If you’re brand new to WEH or your group is - I would highly recommend just taking these sections one month at a time though.
In January we jumped into the Mother’s University (MU) rotation where we have been the last two years. Last year we re-evaluated if we wanted to repeat the Mother’s University or try other study materials like books or other articles, but we ultimately concluded the point of rotating through the material was to come back to the same content each year - but recognize the growth we’ve had in between. The content doesn’t change, but we do. Because of this, for now, our group will keep our discussions within the bounds of Catch Your Vision and the Mother’s University. This doesn’t mean we may not recommend a related video or article or podcast on that month’s topic, but we do stick to the topic themes. Many MOI groups will study a certain book (The Life Giving Home by Sally Clarkson is a popular one in MOI groups) but we ultimately decided to just stick to the content in CYV and MU.
It is important to emphasize that when we study and come together to discuss, we don’t necessarily study EVERY thing in the CYV or MU content for that month. Marlene provides a buffet of knowledge so that you can pick and choose what your soul is craving. For example, in section one of the CYV course, The Mother’s Heart, there are 4 videos to watch, 5 quotes to read, and 3 additional audios to listen to. Many of the sections also have additional websites or articles to read. I try to be thoughtful and prayerful and follow inspiration about what to study. Some months I have consumed everything and others I have simply dwelt on one single headlining quote.
I start each meeting with any housekeeping items and then we say a prayer to invite the Spirit in. Then we move right into discussion. I used to prepare a small snack, but that got to be too much for me so I don’t serve anything anymore. Occasionally someone will bring a snack to share, but it’s just if someone volunteers.
For the first six months or so, none of us knew each other, so it was helpful to ask each person to come prepared with a thought or something that stood out to them from the content. I had index cards and name tags on my entryway table and each person would fill them out when they arrived. We took turns sharing our thoughts and that helped get the discussion going. Now, we have a much more organic flow and don’t use the cards.
I’ve also invited those in our group to bring and share resources or materials we enjoy that coordinate with what we’re learning about. For example, for Nature Study, we had a large stack of nature books to go through. For math, lots of manipulatives and curriculums were shared. Another way to share would be to select a favorite page out of the nature books or in the month of poetry - invite each woman to share their favorite poem. This September, we will be circling back through the CYV course again.
On a final note, if you’re leading a discussion it’s helpful to have a few questions prepared a head of time just in case conversation dies down.
How do you communicate with your group?
We use the GroupMe app.
More On Our Break Off Groups & Group Culture
As our relationships have strengthened we have had several break off groups. This has come from mothers in the group seeking other needs they have. For example, one mother started a “Teen Tuesday” group where all youth 12+ gather once a week from 90 minutes and socialize at her home. Another started a book club where we’ve read books like Modern Miss Mason and Atomic Habits. Another mother started a hiking club over the summer. Other mother’s are involved in co-ops and commonwealths and have invited members of our group into those.
This year we are organizing a new group and calling it “Childrens of Influence.” While a co-ops main focus is typically group classes and socialization is an added component to those groups, our children’s group will be focused more on socialization, service, and leadership development. We are meeting once a month and coordinating our gatherings around the holidays. Our group is still evolving, but right now, our vision include things like a “not-back-to school” water party in August. In September we will recognize Patriot’s Day. In October we’re having a halloween costume party. As part of leadership opportunities we are inviting the youth in our group to help plan and organize the activities for the younger children.
As far as other social gatherings, this last year our group culture has been such that when someone is going to a museum or park or planning a field trip, if they want a group to go with, they text our group and coordinate a day/time and they take charge of any details that need to be organized - like attendance, tour guides, collection of money, ect. I personally don’t care for co-ops especially in this season of life so this has been a good free low pressure and low commitment way for us to gather and offer more like-minded community for our children to make more friends and socialize.
Our 2022 MOI Mother’s Retreat
This year a mother in our group graciously invited us to a 12 hour mother’s retreat in her home. In the season that I am in - this would’ve been very difficult and stressful for me to do. But for my friend, some of her older children are grown and out of the house her youngest, 12, was at a church camp so she was able to open her doors to our group and treat us. My heart was filled with so much gratitude for the time and energy she spent ministering to us - especially those of us who are still in the thick of early motherhood.
She centered the theme of our retreat on Joy because the Mother’s University topic for the month of August is Joy. We called it “Creating a Joy Filled Home: A Mothers of Influence Retreat.” From 10 AM - 10 PM she had a schedule of events that included three meals, snacks, prizes, devotionals, a handicraft, our regular discussion on our MOI topic for the month which was joy, a favorite things exchange, a 9 square game to get our bodies moving, and even a grandMOI keynote speaker who traveled several hours to be with us. We gathered resources and shared our favorite books, found companionship and a few tears together, and ended the night with dessert and a relaxing swim in her pool.
I hope this post has been helpful for you. Over the years I’ve found so many people willing to answer my questions, mentor me through homeschooling, and helping me build a like-minded community so posts like these are just one way I hope to pay it forward and help others. If you have any other questions, don’t hesitate to reach out. If you’re looking for more posts on the Well-Educated Heart I have an in depth post about the philosophy and how we’ve incorporated it into our home here: Heart Education.